Continued from here.

So, how can we know if we are being deceived if, by definition, someone who is being deceived in unaware of the fact? We must accept the reality that we are all vulnerable to being deceived and be willing to do what God says to do in any situation.

For example, does the pain of something done to you decades ago still plague you? If it does, then you have not forgiven the wrongdoer. Yes, what was done to you was unfair, but do you really want to move past the pain and heal? If you don’t, be honest with yourself and accept that you are CHOOSING to continue wallowing in pain that God is more than capable than healing. If you really do want to heal, then DO WHAT GOD TELLS YOU TO DO and forgive the wrongdoer.

Are you struggling with depression or anxiety? The Bible says to go to God with your concerns with thanksgiving. That means you don’t need to spend all of your time fixating on what’s wrong with your life. Instead, thank God for the many blessings He has already given you. If cannot think of any, start with your bathroom. Are you thankful for indoor plumbing? Hot showers? Indoor toilets? Are you thankful that you don’t have to slog through the rain and mud to walk to an outhouse at 3:00 a.m. to relieve yourself? Americans are addicted to comfort and have lost sight of how richly we are blessed compared to most of the world. I’m thankful that I don’t have to walk for hours to access water that I must carry back to my house. I’m thankful that I have the ability to walk.

Whatever is plaguing you, pray for God to give you wisdom and discernment about what He wants you doing to participate in your breakthrough. And search the Bible looking for passages that address your issue. Finally, pray for God to break you free from areas of deception. Be willing to make whatever changes He leads you to do, and you will experience the breakthrough that has been eluding you.

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace sitting before a fireplace and saying, “True Story.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

Continued from here.

I have known many Christians (and I used to be one of them) who do not see themselves clearly and are thus unwilling to do what God tells them to do to achieve the breakthrough they have been praying for. As an example, I know many Christians who are unhappy in their marriages as I once was. I frequently share my testimony of how God healed my marriage – through taking the 40-day journey through Alex Kendrick and Stephen Kendrick’s book, The Love Dare — and then I offer to buy the person a copy of the book. Only a handful take me up on the offer, and to-date, I am not aware of any of them actually completing the 40-day journey.

These people are hurting and asking others to pray for their marriage, and yet they are unwilling to invest 40 days “doing the Love Dare” to their spouses. Why? Because they are deceived, as I was, into believing that the spouse is the one who needs to change. Whenever I hear someone say this (whether directly or through their actions), I know that they are, in fact, contributing to the problem because unconditional love is not proud or self-seeking and keeps no records of wrongs. We want God to supernaturally change our spouses when God is waiting on us to be willing to humble ourselves enough to do the changing, through which God will heal our marriages.

This is only one example of many ways I see Christians deceiving themselves. One considers himself a humble man but continually talks about himself and his problems, keeping himself at the forefront of his mind. Another believes herself to be self-sacrificing for her family, who rarely sees their workaholic loved one because of her workaholism as she idolizes money. He believes needing a beer to unwind every single night is moderation rather than a stronghold while she labels her propensity to gossip as “asking for prayers.” In each of these situations, the Christian is oblivious to the truth that is so obvious to those around him or her.

The saddest part is that after months, years, or even decades of praying for healing that never comes, some Christians walk away from their faith, accusing God of being unfaithful. They never awaken to the reality that God was waiting all of this time for them to do things His way. Before we will be willing to change, we must first acknowledge that we do, in fact, need to change.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cover of The Love Dare. Courtesy Amazon.]

Continued from here.

All of us are vulnerable to self-deception. We see other people’s actions and make judgments based upon them, but we hold ourselves to a different standard, basing our judgments on our motives, past hurts, etc. For example, I judge Joe Smith for speaking rudely to me, but I give myself a pass for doing the same thing to someone else because I’m recovering from the flu. After all, I’m in physical pain, so it’s understandable that I have less self-control today. And yet I don’t consider that perhaps Joe Smith was also in physical pain and needed grace extended toward his rudeness rather than verbal sparring.

It’s painful and embarrassing to own up to our shortcomings. We read about the fruit of the Spirit and want people to perceive us this way, but that’s not who we are. Let’s face it – nobody (other than Jesus) is naturally this way. We have to work at it, and it’s HARD. For example, I always cringe when I hear that someone is praying for patience because I did that myself … and spent the next several months doing a LOT of waiting! After all, how can someone possibly develop patience without having to wait? One needs the conditions for which patience is required in order to develop that fruit. So, a prayer for patience is really inviting God to allow you to wait — to suffer — until you develop patience in response.

A problem with self-deception is that we don’t know that we are being deceived. We actually think we are OK, but we’re not. Those closest to you are likely well-aware of the shortcomings that you lie to yourself about. Just as a tree is known by its fruit, your spiritual fruit (or lack thereof) communicates the truth of what is inside your heart to everyone around you. Instead of reacting in anger when your spouse, parent, or child makes an observation about your behavior, try considering whether he or she might be seeing something that you have been deceiving yourself about.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace looking at herself in a mirror and asking, “Why am I the way that I am?” Courtesy Bitmoji.]