Awakening to Your Sin Leads to Appreciation of Grace

Continued from here.

Church – It’s time to stop minimizing the enormity of our sin and sinful nature. Jesus did not come to make bad people good: he came to make dead people live. If you have ever committed a sin, no matter how “small,” you have committed spiritual mutiny that has separated you from God. The only way back to God is to receive God’s grace that was provided through the humiliating and painful death of his Son, Jesus. If you have committed any sin, you are responsible for Jesus having to die on the cross. Your only way back to God is grace.

Listen to Tauren Wells’ song Known, paying particular attention to these lyrics from the chorus:

And it’s not one or the other. It’s hard truth and ridiculous grace to be known – fully known – and loved by You.”

 

God fully knows us, so he has seen the despicable things we have done, not only in our lives but in our hearts. And yet He extends us grace. If you have hated someone in your heart, you have committed murder. If you have lusted in your heart, you have committed adultery. You are guilty, just as I am.

But here’s the good part: God has extended you grace to forgive you – to wash you clean – from ALL of it! He loves you exactly as you are, right there in you brokenness. He provided you with a way to stand before Him guilty and yet be reconciled with Him because He paid the price Himself through Jesus. God fully knows all of the despicable things you have thought and done, and yet he showers you with “ridiculous” grace – grace that fully covers and washes away your guilt. Once you really get this, you’ll find yourself extending grace to others. A gift this lavish must be paid forward!

[Graphic: Link to YouTube video of Tauren Well’s Known.]

 

God’s Grace for Spiritual Mutiny

no_big_dealContinued from here.

Considering Jesus paid a heavy price to bring us God’s grace, one would expect all Christians to receive it and then pay it forward. And yet many clearly do not because if they actually appreciated the enormity of the grace that God has extended them, then they would treat other people with grace in appreciation for what they have themselves been given. Jesus addressed this dynamic when he anointed a sinful woman:

‘Two people owed money to a certain moneylender. One owed him five hundred denarii, and the other fifty. Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he forgave the debts of both. Now which of them will love him more?’

Simon replied, ‘I suppose the one who had the bigger debt forgiven.’

‘You have judged correctly,’ Jesus said” (Luke 7:41-43).

Note that the two people who owed money to the moneylender in Jesus’ story both received the same percentage of grace: 100%. However, the one who owed more appreciated the grace more. Put another way, the one who recognized the enormity of his debt was more appreciative.

People like to categorize sin: murder = REALLY BAD SIN whereas fudging on your taxes or telling a white lie = LITTLE SIN. But let’s think about what got mankind into the predicament of being separated from God in the first place: eating a piece of fruit. I think all of us would categorize eating a piece of fruit was a LITTLE SIN, but look at what happened! It was spiritual mutiny!

Folks, there are no “little sins.” Every single one of us has committed spiritual mutiny. It might look small like eating a piece of fruit, or it might look huge, resulting in a life prison sentence. However, in either case, our spiritual mutiny separated us from God, and Jesus had to die on the cross to provide a way back into relationship with God. Whether the “worst” sin you ever committed was eating a piece of fruit or mass murder, you are responsible for every wound inflicted upon Jesus’ flesh. Once you really grasp your culpability in crucifying Jesus, your eyes will be opened to the enormity of the grace that God has given you.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace lighting up a cigar with a $100 bill and saying, “No big deal.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

Grace is a Gift We Pay Forward

giftsContinued from here.

In my last blog entry, I shared a story about how I extended grace to a woman who works for a Christian organization who made a mistake. The reason I extended grace was not because she deserved it – she didn’t. And I didn’t do it because her mistake wasn’t costly – it caused inconvenience for the people in my organization. I extended her grace because of the grace that God has extended to me.

In contrast, I had a situation where a Christian woman did not extend grace to me when, due to a miscommunication, she believed she had been wronged. Even though I don’t think I did anything wrong in this particular situation, I nevertheless apologized to her, but even my apology did not placate her. I spent the next few weeks praying blessings over her to help me avoid sowing seeds of bitterness over this unpleasant experience. As I chose to forgive this woman for the way she treated me as well as others, God enlightened me to a truth I otherwise would have missed: This woman likely did not extend me grace because she, herself, has received little grace.

Of course, as a Christian, she has, in fact, been extended an enormous amount of grace through Jesus’ sacrifice for her, as is true for all of us. However, Jesus extending us grace is only half of the equation: we must also receive the grace that he extends to us. Until we do, we will continue to live as if grace has been withheld, even though that really isn’t the case. How heartbreaking it must be for God to have extended grace at such a high cost but have children who never receive that grace!

Giving a gift does not guarantee that the gift will be received. God offers the free gift of grace to all, but we must choose to believe Him and receive the gift before it will do us any good. How heartbreaking that so many people never do receive His gift of grace, even many who represent themselves as being Christians! And until we receive God’s generous gift of grace ourselves, we are unable to pay it forward.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace holding a large stack of presents. Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

Grace Cannot Be Earned

paydayContinued from here.

In my last blog entry, I shared the story of my failure to read a 250-page book at age 8 in the allotted time. I was not met with grace in that situation, but I shared what the outcome might have been if that’s how my story had ended. I wouldn’t have deserved a positive outcome. After all, I didn’t complete the assignment within the time I had been allotted. If I had, then no grace would have been needed. I knew I had failed, and there was nothing I could do about it as the clock kept moving toward the deadline I could no longer meet. And yet what a huge difference it would have made in my life had I received grace instead of punishment … not because I deserved it but because it’s what I needed.

I still need grace – lots and lots of grace – but we live in a world that frequently fails to extend grace. Sadly, I even see this in Christian circles: someone makes a mistake and apologizes, but the other Christian fails to extend grace. I recently had the experience of a Christian making a mistake, and I reacted by extending grace. Her over-the-top level of gratitude communicated volumes: she was not used to receiving grace when making a mistake in her line of work, even though she works for a Christian organization and knew that I was representing one as well. How sad for grace being extended from one Christian to another to be viewed as an anomaly!

To be clear, this woman did not deserve grace. Her mistake caused an inconvenience to the people in my Christian organization, and we had to make adjustments to compensate for her mistake. I didn’t extend her grace because she deserved it. I did it because God has extended grace to me. This woman did not intend to make the mistake and was clearly upset with herself for doing so. She took responsibility and apologized for her mistake. However, none of this “earned” her grace. Grace is always a gift that is extended to someone who doesn’t deserve it.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace being showered with money under the words, “Pay Day.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

The Beauty of Grace

beautifulI’ve been thinking a lot about grace lately … probably because I’m in such need of it! Grace is one of those words that I have only recently grown to understand the meaning of. I grew up hearing the song Amazing Grace, but I didn’t really get it.

I think my problem is, at least in part, that I was shown so little grace throughout much of my life. Always fearing making any sort of mistake, I tried so hard to be “perfect,” which, of course, is not possible in this mortal body. As an abused child, my abusers would often set me up to “fail” and then abuse me as purported “discipline,” so I learned at a young age that it wasn’t OK to make mistakes.

One particular experience has stuck with me all these years. When I was in third grade (only 8 years old!), I begged the teacher to let me read a real novel for a book report. Sure enough, reading a book with over 200 pages at age 8 in the short period of time allotted proved to be too much for my little brain. By the night before the book report was due, I still had 50 more pages left to read, and my little brain couldn’t handle it. Instead of receiving grace, I received punishment and shame, with my abusers using my “failure” to complete my assignment as an excuse to inflict more abuse, telling me it was all my fault.

To this day, playing “beat the clock against” a deadline triggers my post-traumatic stress because of that experience, so I always work ahead and strive to complete tasks early. I know I cannot stay focused once the post-traumatic stress kicks in. What I learned from that experience is that it doesn’t matter whether I have completed five times as much work as everyone else. If I do not complete the task given me perfectly, I’m going to suffer.

I have prayed over what grace might have looked like in this situation. What if my parents had said, “I’m so proud of you for reading 200 page at age eight. Let’s cuddle together, and I’ll read you the rest of the book?” What if the focus was not on what I didn’t do (finish reading 50 more pages) and instead celebrated what I had done (reading far more than is typically expected of an eight-year-old child)? Yes, I missed the deadline. No, I didn’t do the assignment perfectly. But what if I was given the message that I was loved whether or not I completed the assignment perfectly? That’s grace.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace smiling under the word, “Beautiful.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

Don’t Judge the Prodigal – You Don’t Know Where He has Been

barrelContinued from here.

As God revealed this version of the parable of the Workers in the Vineyard to me, I thought about the parallels in this story to the Prodigal Son. I heard a great sermon on that parable in which the pastor said, “Don’t judge the prodigal because you don’t know where he’s been.” The workers who had been in the fields all day assumed that the time that James was not in the field was spent doing something more pleasant, such as playing video games or sleeping in. However, James would have done anything to have been in that field working all day. Those workers had no idea what James’ day had actually been like. They were correct that James didn’t deserve the denarius, and James fully agreed. The difference is that the unmerited favor of God’s grace elicited thanksgiving from James – who suffered more – but grumbling from the other workers – who suffered less.

Whenever I hear someone say he wants to be treated as he deserves, I respond that I am immensely grateful that God DOES NOT treat me like I deserve. I relate much more to James than I do to the other workers because I know how hard my life journey has been. I know how much I suffered as I tried to make my own way while others labored under the protection of their heavenly Father. No one is more aware than I am of how far I fall short and how undeserving I am of the grace that God has given me … and I am so immensely grateful for that grace that I could never earn or attain on my own.

PRAISE GOD for His “unfairness.” THANK GOD that “he does not treat us as our sins deserve or repay us according to our iniquities” (Ps. 103:10). PRAISE GOD that He is generous … that He sees the pain we suffer outside his vineyard … and that He loves us enough to keep coming back and looking for us, inviting us to join Him in his vineyard of grace.

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace wearing a barrel. Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

The Landowner’s “Unfairness”

thank_you1Continued from here.

James was unable to find any more work so late in the day, and he faced the reality that he would likely have to bury his sister in the morning. He no longer had the will to go on and decided that if she was going to die, then he would join her. He had nothing left to live for. At 4:45 p.m., he headed back to the marketplace looking for the drug dealer. He planned to offer his body in payment for enough drugs to take the lives of both his sister and himself. Whether they went to heaven or hell, they would go together.

The drug dealer agreed to the terms and began to lead James to a secluded area for his “payment.” At that moment, the landowner’s bus pulled up, and the landowner invited James, along with others in the area, to come work in his vineyard. Although James knew that one hour’s work would not be enough, something inside told him to go with the landowner, so he did. For one glorious hour, he focused on the work and drove all other thoughts out of his mind. The time passed too quickly, and then the foreman called him over, along with the 5:00 p.m crew, to receive his wages.

When the foreman placed a denarius into James’ hand, he thought it was a mistake and tried to return the money. However, the foreman assured him there was no mistake: the landowner had instructed him to pay James a denarius for a job well done. James dropped to his knees and sobbed, praising God for saving not only his sister’s life but his as well. He knew he didn’t deserve a denarius. James was so overcome with joy and astonishment and was too busy thanking and praising God to notice the grumblings of the other workers as they judged James as unworthy of receiving the denarius. If he had heard their complaints, James would have fully agreed with them: the denarius was his solely because of grace.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace flat on her face at someone’s feet saying, “Thank you!” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

What the 5:00 p.m. Worker Did while the Others Labored

helpContinued from here.

James tripled-checked his alarm clock to make sure it was set so he could be the first to arrive in the marketplace in the morning. He was unable to sleep because of his sister’s persistent coughing. He did everything he could to help her breathe and finally fell asleep at 3:00 a.m. next to his sister. He mother awoke at 3:30 a.m. and saw her children sleeping peacefully together. She decided her son needed his rest and turned off the alarm clock.

James awoke to sunlight flooding the room as terror swept over him. “No! No! No!” he screamed as he saw how pale his sister looked as she coughed and slept. She wouldn’t survive another night without the antibiotics, but how could he afford them now?

He ran to the marketplace, but the place for the day laborers was empty. He heard that the landowner had needed more workers and had come at 9:00 a.m. looking for more, but James had just missed the bus. James held back tears and pushed back the panic, determined to figure out some way to earn a denarius by evening. He went store to store and door to door, begging for any type of job – no matter how small – and did several short, unpleasant odd jobs for half what they were worth, from unclogging toilets to scooping manure out of a barn. Around 11:30 a.m., he returned to the day laborers’ spot at the marketplace and saw others milling about, hoping for a half-day job.

A man rolled up his hotdog stand, and the day laborers formed a line to purchase lunch. James had not eaten in two days and was tempted to use the little money he had earned to buy himself a modest lunch. But what if that would have been the exact amount needed to pay for the antibiotics by the end of the day? To avoid the temptation, he left the marketplace to look for more work and never saw or heard the landowner’s bus drive up looking for more workers at noon.

By 2:30 p.m., James had earned a little more cash, but it was far from enough, and he was growing desperate. He returned to the marketplace, hoping for even a few hours’ work, and sat among others waiting for the same thing. A drug dealer sat beside him and offered to sell him drugs to ease his pain. James declined, telling him he didn’t need drugs – he needed money for antibiotics for his dying sister. The drug dealer offered to sell him enough drugs to put his sister out of her misery so she wouldn’t have to suffer. In return, he wanted no money but rather to use James as a prostitute. James stormed off and again looked for more work. He never saw or heard the landowner’s bus drive up looking for more workers at 3:00 p.m.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace sinking in quicksand and yelling, “Help!” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

Perspective of a 5:00 p.m. Worker

life_is_hardContinued from here.

The parable of the Workers in the Vineyard is unpopular because we identify with the early morning workers. Why should they get paid the same amount as the 5:00 p.m. workers who only put in one hour? Let’s take a look at the story from the perspective of James, a 5:00 p.m. worker.

At age 15, James’ life had been hard. His mother was mentally ill, and he never knew which version of her would walk through the door. Some days, she would have irrational rages and present a physical threat. Other days, she was so disoriented that she didn’t know who he was. But once a week or so, the mother who loved him would surface, and she was exceedingly kind. James frequently thought it would be easier for his mother always to behave as a monster so he could hate her. Her shifting personas was very disorienting.

James’ father was the only one who could “manage” his mother. His parents had known each other since they were children, so his father always knew the right things to say to calm her. His father was a hard worker but uneducated, so he didn’t make much money, and the family lived paycheck to paycheck. That paycheck ended a year ago when his father was tragically killed by faulty equipment at his job, and the employer accused his father of negligence to avoid having to pay for his wrongful death. Thus, James had to drop out of school at age 14 and go to work as a day laborer, where his large body could pass for age 16. He would go to the marketplace where other day laborers congregated and seek employment by the day.

The one bright spot in James’ life was his eight-year-old sister, but she had become ill. She coughed constantly, and James worried when she did not recover after weeks of rest. He scraped together enough cash to pay for a doctor’s visit and lost a day of work taking her to the appointment. The doctor diagnosed her with pneumonia and said she needed to start antibiotics immediately, or she would die. Unfortunately, the doctor was out of free samples, but he wrote a prescription that would cost one denarius to fill. While walking her home from the doctor’s office, James ran into another day laborer who told him of a rumor that a landowner was hiring day laborers for one denarius, so be sure to arrive in the marketplace in the morning before daybreak. James saw this opportunity as an answer to his prayers.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace reclining on a couch with her hand to her head saying, “Life is Hard.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard

judgeMy pastor recently gave a sermon on an unpopular parable: “The Parable of the Workers in the Vineyard.” Here’s the parable from Matt. 20:1-16:

For the kingdom of heaven is like a landowner who went out early in the morning to hire workers for his vineyard. He agreed to pay them a denarius for the day and sent them into his vineyard.

“About nine in the morning he went out and saw others standing in the marketplace doing nothing. He told them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard, and I will pay you whatever is right.’ So they went.

“He went out again about noon and about three in the afternoon and did the same thing. About five in the afternoon he went out and found still others standing around. He asked them, ‘Why have you been standing here all day long doing nothing?’

“‘Because no one has hired us,’ they answered.

“He said to them, ‘You also go and work in my vineyard.’

“When evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his foreman, ‘Call the workers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last ones hired and going on to the first.’

“The workers who were hired about five in the afternoon came and each received a denarius. So when those came who were hired first, they expected to receive more. But each one of them also received a denarius. When they received it, they began to grumble against the landowner. ‘These who were hired last worked only one hour,’ they said, ‘and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the work and the heat of the day.’

“But he answered one of them, ‘I am not being unfair to you, friend. Didn’t you agree to work for a denarius? Take your pay and go. I want to give the one who was hired last the same as I gave you. Don’t I have the right to do what I want with my own money? Or are you envious because I am generous?’

“So the last will be first, and the first will be last.”

Seems pretty unfair, right? Praise God for his “unfairness!”

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace scowling from a judge’s chair above the word, “Judging.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]