Lumping the “Good Guys” in with the “Bad Guys”

Continued from here.

This week, I’m responding to an excellent blog article entitled The Good Guys, written by my favorite blogger, Gary Thomas. I encourage you to read this article first.

Thomas pointed out that there’s a valid reason why many women have a negative attitude about men:

I am surrounded by men who heroically serve, honor, respect, support and cherish their wives. But when I read Christian blogs and go on social media, I’m bombarded by how awful men are, how they are abusive, power-hungry, dismissive of those who prey on women, and misogynistic. I don’t doubt these stories; many of the readers of this blog have been deeply hurt by men in all those categories. I agree with the voices of many that there needs to be not just less tolerance but no tolerance for the way women have been mistreated by men. But for this one post, I’d like to highlight and pay deference to some of the good guys.”

I don’t like when people make assumptions about me because of what other people who share a characteristic with me have done. For example, I don’t like when people assume that I cannot handle a direct conversation because I am a woman or that I’m an intolerant bigot because I am a Christian. And as a survivor of child abuse and rapes, I really don’t like it when people make comments that someone who has been raped is “damaged goods,” likely to abuse others, or too broken to be healed. Yes, there are child abuse survivors who remained emotionally damaged for life and even a handful who go on to abuse children themselves, but that is NOT who I am!

I don’t like being judged by the negative traits of others in a group, so why do I tolerate this widespread lumping together of all men into the same category as those who exhibit the worst traits? After all, both my husband and son are “good guys,” so I know better. I know the quality man I married and the young man I have raised, and I certainly don’t want the world assuming these awful things about them. Thus, I’m joining Thomas in speaking out, using the same platform that he did.

To be continued…

[Graphic: Cover of Sacred Marriage: What If God Designed Marriage to Make Us Holy More Than to Make Us Happy? Courtesy Amazon.]



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