Figuring out What to Do “in the Secret”

i_dont_knowContinued from here.

The first morning I tithed the first hour of my day to God, I didn’t know what to do. I was leading a Bible study, so I knew I could complete that work during this time, but that would not take the whole hour. I did not have a robust prayer life – it was mostly a laundry lists of things I wanted God to do for me, which was mostly healing my emotional pain and taking care of people in my life who I love. I wasn’t sure how to hang out with someone “without skin” for an hour.

I was authentic with God on that first day. I told Him that I’m here but don’t know what He wants me to do now that I am. I was used to rushing through my prayers at night before falling asleep, and I would squeeze in doing my Bible study homework between errands. So, having the luxury of a full hour enabled me to slow down with both and really “be there” in the moment instead of focused on whatever was next on my to-do list. I got more out of the Bible study homework because I could slow down and really soak in what I was reading. Since I ran out of things to ask God to do for me, I spent some time simply being quiet to invite God to speak to me.

I reminded God that He promises to be found if I seek Him with my whole heart:

You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.” ~ Jer. 29:13

I told God I did not know how to do this, but I wanted to learn. I said I was going to show up day after day, week after week, month after month, and year after year until I find Him. That first hour was dedicated to Him, and I wanted to find Him.

To help me focus on this goal, I downloaded songs with a theme of “in the secret” – anything that talked about wanting to get to know God better, meeting Him in a hiding place, or anything else that would focus my thoughts on finding Him. I burned a CD of those songs and listened to it repeatedly so even throughout my day, my thoughts constantly returned to wanting to get to know God more. And then God showed up!

Continued here.

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace scratching her head and saying, “I don’t know.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

 

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