What Lack of Reconciliation after Forgiveness Looks Like

not_todayContinued from here.

Person #2 was in my life for many years. She got the misimpression that I was a threat to something she wanted and wreaked havoc that harmed not only me but others as well. To date, she has taken no responsibility for any of this.

As with Person #1, I prayed for her. I refused to “feed the bitterness” because I had learned from my situation with Person #1. Whenever I was tempted to dwell on negative thoughts about her, I prayed for her instead. I feel no bitterness toward her. I am not happy about how she has behaved and her continued unwillingness to take any responsibility for the harm she inflicted on me and others, but I do not allow myself to dwell on those thoughts.

God has placed heavily on my heart that I am to have nothing to do with Person #2, despite having forgiven her. To make sure I was hearing God correctly, I looked for Bible verses to confirm that not reconciling with someone is consistent with God’s Word. Here’s what I found:

Take special note of anyone who does not obey our instruction in this letter. Do not associate with them, in order that they may feel ashamed. Yet do not regard them as an enemy, but warn them as you would a fellow believer.” ~ 2 Thes. 3:14-15

But now I am writing to you that you must not associate with anyone who claims to be a brother or sister but is sexually immoral or greedy, an idolater or slanderer, a drunkard or swindler. Do not even eat with such people.” ~ 1 Cor. 5:11

After much prayer, the conclusion I reached is that God does not want people in rebellion against His ways to benefit from a relationship with me. This ties into the sowing and reaping principle that is woven into many parts of the Bible. When someone does not repent of his wrongdoing, allowing him to reap the benefits of a relationship with you violates God’s sowing and reaping principle.

Continued here.

[Graphic: Cartoon of Grace with her hand on her hip saying, “Not Today.” Courtesy Bitmoji.]

3 thoughts on “What Lack of Reconciliation after Forgiveness Looks Like

  1. Thanks for the reminder to continue to pray for this person that no longer is a part of my life. After years that bitterness will sometimes creep in.


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